Respondez S'il Vous Wait...

Nathan was perplexed.

He'd organised his birthday party a month in advance, eagerly sending out individual invitations to more than a dozen friends from across the years via his Facebook page.

A week before the event, plenty had commented but more than a few had responded with a "Maybe", despite the presence of a prominent 'RSVP' within the p-a-g-e.

He then used the social network's 'reminder' function, to, well, remind his nearest and dearest of the forthcoming event.

A day before, with his mobile phone glowing, he decided to text a few of those he had considered in his closest circle. The silence that followed was deafening.

"I hadn't issued out a general group invite," writes Nathan.
"I'd only wanted to celebrate my birthday at the pub surrounded by my mates - mates, I might add, whose parties I'd often dragged myself out of the house on cold and rainy nights to attend."

The RSVP was once as much a must-have for a special outing or occasion as a new outfit and a social status.

It spoke volumes of the good breeding of the Invited and also served as a way for the Inviter to keep a tally on numbers and gauge just how many devils-on-horseback to whip up.

Today's Facebook invites have an added benefit of letting the Invited know just who will be in attendance.

No longer are Inviters bothered with those tedious phone calls in the busy lead-up to the event to find out "who's coming" or if Rachel will be there because, of course, she's had a falling out with Jenny ever since that day when Tom was seen at the races with her.

Facebook has indeed changed the world of the party invite.

But there is one big pitfall to this easier, more open world of who's in and who's out - and I call it the Respondez S'il Vous Wait.

The Invited can and often do now choose to hold off on their RSVP to an event - for a variety of reasons - thanks to Facebook's Maybe button.

The RSVW may simply be due to rotating work rosters and an inability to confirm their availability on the night.

Or, more sinisterly, it's an opportunity to R-S-V-Wait-and-See who else is attending, or even if there is a better offer coming in the cyber-pipeline.

Whatever the case, it's simply not good form to adopt this approach.

If you're available, make a decision.

There's far too many Maybes in the world. Be a Yes or a No and pick a side.

As for Nathan's Maybes out there, I think it's safe to say you can expect a RSVW at your next event.